Citizen Fall

Ridicule: What Every Woman Wants

Posted in Ladies, Romance by ryedog on March 9, 2009

Women are an enigma, a universal paradox for which men will never devise a solution.

One minute they’re cold, the next minute they’re hot. One day they’re as arid as the Sahara, the next day they’re as fertile as the Amazon rain forest.

When you’re single, trying to figure out the biology of a woman is as useless and futile as trying to bag one. They say a woman likes to be pursued, but that won’t stop one from keeping your penis on the longest leash possible before deciding she’s sick of you, upon which time she’ll hollow out your chest cavity by extracting your heart and soul to display for the world to see.

But it’s all so easy. The pain is so avoidable. For whatever reason, females enjoy being talked down to and insulted constantly. Yes, women are strangely attracted to assholes.

And Bullz-eye has proof, in the form of real-life success stories of young men who have excelled at making attractive females feel like they’re an insult to procreation.

Case in point:

This girl at my gym is of those that I’ve always wanted to talk to but never really had the chance. She was bartending the other night and I told her I’d seen her at the gym. She said “yeah, but I don’t make it in there as much lately.” I replied “Yeah, I can tell, you’re really letting yourself go.” Then she gives me a shot and asks me if I’d help her with her workout.” She also said she remembered me from the gym and I said “So you were checking me out?” So I get her number, not bad, eh?

Well done.

2 Responses

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  1. M said, on July 1, 2009 at 3:36 am

    This is the stupidest article I have ever read. Yes some women may be stupid enough for some reason to enjoy being insulted but I have never met one of those girls.

    Men are a-holes. They think that women are stupid and disposable. They are not. Whether you know it or not we know more about what you like than you know about us.

    I hope you find a real woman that you like and she really does rip your heart out.

  2. ryedog said, on July 1, 2009 at 4:16 am

    Nobody said you had to like the article. You shouldn’t have wasted your time and energy throwing threats my way by telling me things I already know.

    Of course, your opinion on the article—which is laced with sarcasm, by the way—is respected, but for all your hatred, it sure is peculiar you took the time to read the whole thing. And that’s all that matters.

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